Marvel Cinematic Universe Future Adaptions: They could do Worse

Good day viewers, today I’m going to discuss a new and important topic…what some of the upcoming Marvel Cinematic Universe productions should be!
Earlier this week, I saw the premiere episode of Agents of SHIELD and I was…blown away, Joss Whedon captured the feel of the MCU perfectly on a comparatively smaller budget. If you’re a Marvel fan and you haven’t seen it then that’s like sticking your head in a bucket of piranha and not expected to get eaten…it is terribly stupid.

Now I decided to give my opinion on which properties they should adapt next, and my opinions on these most excellent adaptions are as follows, drumroll please…

1.Avengers Academy: For those of you who aren’t familiar with it, Avengers Academy is a series about these teenage metahumans who get taken under the Avengers’ wing so they can be trained into superheroes…the twist being that (the initial six at least) were washouts of the formerly Norman Osborn owned Superhero Registration Act most likely to turn into supervillains.

Since we can’t get the X-Men worked into the MCU (damn movie rights), this would do just as well, it’d make a terrific TV show and a great high school drama (normally I hate those kinds of shows, but doing in it the context of a superhero school I’d actually enjoy that) with issues unique to superheroes-in-training…it’d be even better if they could get the copyright issue settled enough for Dust and Rockslide to be students (Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch are going to be in Avengers 2 after all, the Muslim and the Thing fanboy just need to be something other than mutants.)

2.Howard the Duck: Say what you will about George Lucas’ steaming shithole of a film…because unless you’re praising it, it’s true. But as hard as George Lucas dropped the black dwarf bowling ball on that, the series is due for a new adaptation that doesn’t suck.

I may not have read the comics for myself (yet) but from what I can tell, this series is extremely funny…what kind of superhero doesn’t want to be a superhero and yet continually get dragged into crap that’s too weird for most superheroes to face, such as Jackpot the One armed Bandit, Doctor Bong, Kong Lomerate, Status Quo, and the Band of the Bland.

If made into a movie, the MCU would have a great comedy franchise that could compete with the other oddball comedies in cinema today, especially given the unique nature of its humor…

3.Nextwave: Agents of HATE: This series deserves an adaptation in some form, and why? …Well why the fuck not?! There’s action by the bucket load, comedy that can come only from the pen of a master like Warren Ellis, plenty of great characters, and frigging Machine Man!
If this series were made into a film, what would ensue is the Gurren Lagann of superhero films, a romp through awesomeness itself with comedic mishaps, epic fanservice, and more amazing than anything they’ve made so far (not counting the Avengers.)

So that’s it, my personal hopes on what they adapt next…I’d like to hear your opinions too though.

So tell me…what would you love to see marvel adapt next?

Also, if you were expecting the pictures and captions, I’m afraid there’s been a problem with them today…they should be working next week though.

Webcomic nearly ready

Sorry folks, new theories today, I wish to come with some brand new news on an exciting development in my webcomic…I finally have a background artist! All I need now is the reference models completed so I can begin publishing this work of awesomeness!
Soon enough, you shall be given a preview of it…when that happens is a different story.

See you next week!

Why so Swedish? (Though to be fair, he's Norwegian)

People, the season of the railroad is here…and by railroad, I mean Hell on Wheels.

Today, I’ve got a new theory I came up with personally…is the Swede the western version of the Joker?

 He's got some interesting business cards doesn't he?

That’s right boys and girls, I’m here to wonder whether or not violently insane ol’ mister Gunderson is the wild west version a certain “Psychotic, wicked clown”, how is this possible you ask? I’ll explain, writing this as I am while watching Jason Bourne snap some a-hole’s neck like a fricking twig.

 Could he kill the asshole in the helmet next?

First off, his name helped me figure this out. The Swede, The Joker, they both have the same ring; Hell, they even have the same damn amount of numbers in their names.

Secondly, while an affably evil figure in the first season, his fall from grace at the hands of a pair of Irish guys plus getting fired and demoted to a mere corpse dumper (in other words, gravedigger) happened all in one day…same came to a certain clown.

 And we don't mean Violent J.

The more obvious similarities come when you realize that in the second season (during his attempt to lord over the Soux) he used some kind of muck that made his skin appear white, and the Heath Ledger Joker used makeup to apply whiteness to his skin (though unlike Joker he didn’t shave his hair, looking much more like Count Orlok than the would-be Juggalo.

The Swede is also (like the Joker) very clever, and can turn most situations to his advantage. Most anybody can scoop up dead bodies, but it’s kinda rare to find a man capable of also manipulating a giant army of Indians into crushing a town’s spirit with a truly devastating invasion.

 Though personally I'd have attacked them with shitty computers and ineffectual tech support.

What strikes me as the biggest tip-off is how the Swede gets totally unhinged during Season Two, his madness is such that he frigging DANCES in a burning town while most everyone else is dying around him, he might not laugh like a damn hyena but he sure does enjoy his carnage. Ol’ Joker is no less insane, crazy, or just plain psychotic as him. So while the Swede isn’t as laughably evil as mister ‘Clown Devil Boy’ (child of the Witch Heifer), his own madness is in equal to him.

 Pictured: The magnificent bastard himself.

 

And that folks, is my theory for this week, when you go to watch Hell on Wheels next time; remember my theory and ask yourself…is Bohannon a Batman or a Punisher?

 Punisher...definitely Punisher.

Incredible plot theories: Are the 'you're adopted' jokes harsh in Violet's case?

Welcome again, dear reader to another installment of my blog. Today we’ll be discussing a theory I’ve heard from others...is Violet Parr, of The Incredibles, adopted?

Named as she is, I'm surprised she can't shrink.

Now then, how many people actually subscribe to this, I do not know but here’s what I make of it.

This didn’t really cross my mind the first time I saw the film, but in hindsight (a lot of it) I’m wondering why I didn’t think this sooner, I mean, Violet’s hair is a different color than either of her parents’ and that should have been a dead giveaway.

Of course, the hair could be a recurrent gene (it’s a dominant one for humans, but supers might have differently functioning genes) but since we know what neither of Bob or Helen’s (AKA Mr. Incredible and Elastigirl) parents look like, it good be anyone’s guess.

There’s also the possibility of Violet being the result of an affair, but I doubt they’ll take this plotline for the next movie due to the mature nature of the whole idea; but on the other hand, after Paranorman and some of the more…radar breaking plot twists, this might not actually be too impossible.

So then, if she was adopted, who were her parents? I have three possibilities here.

One (and this one was thought up by a guy on TV Tropes) is that she originally belonged to normal human parents who didn’t want a superpowered child in a world where superheroes weren’t wanted anymore. As tragic as that turn of events would be, it’d certainly be much better than this situation if it occurs in the X-Men, wherein the child would sadly have more chances of just getting killed instead.

These next two are ones I thought up.

Another theory is that her parents were both superheroes who died, while no less tragic this could be a just as good setup for the sequel. After all, why exactly do you put a young Super in the custody of other supers when their parents are dead, granted Bob and Helen might have shown interest in her (the dead heroes being friends of theirs) but another reason could be a second example of the Superhero Relocation Program being an extreme version of the Witness Protection Program…to protect her from still living enemies of her parents. Yep, that’d make an interesting sequel wouldn’t it?

 Or perhaps this version of Superman's the father, and people didn't want her taking after him.

But my preferred theory as to Violet’s parentage…is that her parents were supervillains.

Now that’s a shocker ain’t it? Superhero finds out her real parents were actually horrible people, of course this’d probably cause an interesting situation should the villains in question have never wanted to lose violet and she was forcefully taken away by the government.

Now as far as how this would go in a possible sequel of the Incredibles, I don’t know what the villains would look or act like but I personally think the father would be…an expy of the Joker mixed with Ladd Russo.

 'Cause every girl's crazy 'bout a sharp dressed man...when he isn't trying to kill everyone.

Yeah, that’s part of my idea for what the sequel would pertain. In addition to a misfit to team of superheroes appearing as supporting characters, but those ideas are for a different time.

Anyways, sorry about how short today’s installment is, but- Wait a sec, what’s landing on my lawn…

HOLY SHIT! The Space Marines are attacking…damn, I knew I should have paid the electric bills. 

 "Surrender your money, heretic!"